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Good morning good afternoon good evening and good night to some of you depending on where you are
I urgently need an advice for a friend of mine who has been struggling and searching for a spouse
He is in his early thirties and according to him, since he became an adult he has dated only 3 ladies and none of the relationships lasted more than six months
The first lady he dated, or should I say the first lady he thought he dated because they never talked about anything, they were just close friends more like best friends
They were friends for good eight years helping, advising each other where and when necessary. They really loved each other and shared a lot of things in common; they were so close that people began to think they were already married but they weren't
Their friendship came to an end the day my friend asked the lady to be his fate officially; she blatantly refused without giving any reason. This devastated Emma my friend because he was already planning his future with the lady in mind not knowing that the lady wasn't even thinking that far
What marvels him the most is that the lady told him that she really loved him and that he's the best man any lady would love to marry yet she turned him down for no reason
He met the second lady who admired and claimed to love him so much, they were really getting on well together until the lady travelled outside the state in search of greener pastures.
She suddenly changed, stopped calling and answering calls and got irritated by things that used to make her happy. They had misunderstandings and disagreements until Emma discovered that she was dating another guy.
When asked she said she loved Emma very much and that he's a nice guy but they can't be together and that was how they broke up
Then came the third lady, promising to stay. A very nice lady, beautiful, virtuous and all. They were really in love and my friend was happy at last, he thought he found everything he wanted. They professed love and promised heaven and earth to each other
A day never passed without them talking to each other for at least 2 hours on the phone and they see each other almost every weekend.
But Emma happened to be so occupied one day that he forgot to call the love of his life, so he expected her to call and know why. According to him, he wanted to know whether she truly loves and misses him by calling
It's almost two weeks now, she has not called to know why Emma, who never fails to call her several times everyday has not called her in two weeks, and they didn't have any issue before that
My friend is almost heart broken now because he sees this as a sign that he's neither loved nor missed. The whole thing started two days to his birthday, so she didn't even call on his birthday
Also note that, Emma's love is well and healthy according to the information he gathered from her siblings and friends, she simply decided not to call for reason (s) best known to her alone
What do you think of the whole issue? Should Emma break the silence and make the call or should he wait more?
Is it really a sign that the lady doesn't love him?
what would you advice Emma to do?
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14
Isaac Christian 13 NovI voted for breaking the silence and my reasons are clear. In the end , whether now or sometime in future, the silence must be broken. A friend of mine will say, "why waste time over a task that must be done".
Even if they have to formally break up, it must be communicated formally.
So, Emma has to call but with a "caveat".
It's all too clear that the relationship is one-sided or should I say communication, because we can't establish the existence of a relationship.
Emma should grow up. He should call her, smoothen things out and then manage his emotions better.
It's very possible he would suffer his past fate again. Something might be wrong somewhere.
12
Chinedu Mbamalu 13 NovYou know, @Isaac Christian I always look forward to your opinions on issues because you're always apt, spot on. These were the exact things I told him and this your response is just a confirmation. Thank you so much
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Chinedu Mbamalu 14 NovCorrect. Jist know that you won my respect and admoration. Thank you for being you. Have a pleasant weekend too sir
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Isaac Christian 14 NovThanks a million times. We just do things the way we know best to go about it, not knowing and not minding if someone is watching.
Down here at UPTRENND, I understand that's exactly the way we should function.
Incidentally, a few people see us and we see a few people and we forge affinities.
Have a pleasant weekend
10
Syed Inayat shah 13 NovHere is about to night. So, i will tell you that good night sir
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ifeoma enudu 14 NovHe should break the silence and call, you may never know, something might just be wrong with her.
Emma should also get some help from any love junkies around, I think he is not getting it some how.
He need to get some lessons from a player around also, because you get to know the does and don'ts of love from a serial player. And he should do so with both a male and a female player.
Whatever he learn From all this people, both the good and bad, he should put them in practice and he will have a sweet ride next time.
I hope this helps him.
Best of luck to your friend.
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Chinedu Mbamalu 14 NovWooow! Your advice will go a very long way because I know my friend is wet behind the ears when it comes to issues of love and relationships